Whenever we think of mother-in-law we get the image of a disapproving and nagging woman. But this is not the scenario in real life. We get this notion because of all those movies and the TV shows. But remember they are fiction and not reality. I am not saying that everyone is really good but always keep an open mind when you enter a new home because they do not know you and neither do you know them. If you have pre conceived notion it might not turn out fruitful for your relation.
Relation of a mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is a tricky one and only time and patience can nurture this relationship. Always remember you might have fights and disagreements but you are still connected and both of you have a common link between you and that is the man you both love dearly. Whether you are a newly married or someone who’s well versed in the ways of married life, there are many trials that you must overcome but the first and foremost of all of them is maintaining a good relationship with your mother in law. Sometimes things work out very easily but there were times would be situations where you would have things you’d want to say but you just can’t well, because, she’s your mother in law, right?
But that should not be the scenario as there are things every woman wants to tell her mother in law because it will make your relationship with her smoother and not awkward. Here are those things that she should know:
Top Things Every Woman Wants Her Mother In Law To Know
It is not that your mother in law cannot tell you how to go about something but tell her that she should also trust you with the work. It is not that you are telling her that you are expert in it but you are just asking her to trust you as trust is very important to build any relation.
Try Connecting With Me First:
Tell her that you know she wants you to be the perfect daughter in law but also ask her to give you time and try to connect with you personally first. As you are new to the house and you do not know anyone nor do they know you so, connecting with you personally first will definitely make things easier.
I Am Not Taking Your Son Away From You:
Many of the mother-in-laws fear that their daughter-in-law would take their beloved son away from them. Well, make them understand that this is not the case as you love her son as much as she does and you are definitely not taking him away from her. You are on the other hand sharing him with her willingly. Despite what the daily soaps may portray he loves both of you equally and you should tell this to your mother-in-law.
If You Do Not Like Something About Me Confront:
It might happen that your mother-in-law might not like everything about you. So, it is your work to tell her that if she does not like anything about you then she must confront you so, that you get a chance to get to work on it. If you do not tell her this, then she will keep quiet and then you might find out the same from the members of the family and that can simply spoil your relation.
Do Not Compare Me To Others:
Comparing has always been a part of our society and we have seen this from our childhood itself. Well, if you do not want the same thing in your happily married life then tell your mother-in-law the same that you know that you might not be perfect but she should not compare you to others as you are a separate individual and she should accept you that way.
Do Not Believe On What You Hear:
As you have pre conception so does your mother-in-law. She tends to have a conception that you might be too good to be true and what she has heard about you might be true so it is you who have to tell her not to believe what she hears and ask her to get to know you because you love her for just being the mother of the person you are married to and you also love dearly.
I Trust Your Wisdom But Sometimes I Like To Do Things My Way:
Tell your mother-in-law that you respect her wisdom and knowledge of handling things but also tell her that at times you want to handle things your way. This open communication will make your relation sweet.
Marriage Is A Part Of Life And Not My Whole Life:
Tell her that being the perfect daughter-in-law and wife is only a part of your life and there is more to your life than marriage. Telling this will solve a lot of your problems if you are a working daughter-in-law.
Do Not Drag Your Son In Our Conflict:
There might be times when we lock heads but do not drag your son in our conflict as he loves both of us and it is difficult for him too.
Sometimes I Want You To Be My Friend:
Being new to the house and family can get overwhelming at times so tell your mother-in-law that sometimes you just need her to be your friend whom you can talk to.
Most of the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law relation these days are like friends as they meet quite a few times before the marriage so that they know each other well. But this relation becomes more beautiful if the daughter-in-law is of the same community as theirs and for that, they search through community matrimonial sites like Kayastha matrimonial sites for a bride for their son. But yet telling your mother-in-law these things can simply make your relationship with her very smooth.